Mental Health Awareness Week 2018

To mark the start of Mental Health Awareness Week I want to share my story of living with Depression & Anxiety.

I’m rolling it back to early 2017, I was at my lowest & I felt this wave of anxiety & depression take over me. I had previously struggled with both but this time it creeped up on me without any warning & smothered me.

I was lost, miserable & angry. The anger stemmed from my frustration of a Three Year battle to conceive. Infertility Appointments which made me feel like a failure. The Specialists had no answers as to why I couldn’t have a Baby which added to my miserable state. Unexplained Infertility.

I struggled to deal with the situation I was in, I pushed people away, I lashed out & I hated myself.

A dark cloud was over me all the time, I tried to shrug it off or ignore it but I just couldn’t. My actions spiralled out of control as I couldn’t see a way out of the situation. I turned to painkillers to help me manage. Of course, they didn’t help but I had to take them.

One day I broke down to my Husband, he could see that I was in a bad place & had noticed I was hiding painkillers from him. He always reassured me that the Infertility issues were our problems, not just mine & we could find a solution to any problem. He encouraged me to reach out to my GP & seek help & that’s exactly what I did.

The hardest part was opening up & telling someone how I felt without covering it up with “but it’s fine, I’ll be okay” or “I’ll deal with it, I just have to”. I came off painkillers, spoke to my husband more about my inner battles & I acknowledged my anger & worked to change it into something positive.

A year on, I still choke up at the thought of what would have happened if I continued down the road I was on because I was desperately looking for a road out.

I opened up. I told someone how I really felt. I got help. Here I am, a year on, 37 weeks pregnant with our little miracle. I’m extremely lucky & thankful & I continue to battle my demons but I’m not alone.

Don’t suffer in silence. Reach out. My door is always open to others who want to talk.

The following links have useful info & support:

https://www.seemescotland.org

https://www.mentalhealth.org.uk

https://www.samaritans.org

5 thoughts on “Mental Health Awareness Week 2018”

  1. I absolutely loved reading this, Congratulations about your baby!! 💞 thank you so much for sharing your story about anxiety and depression, it makes my heart so full seeing so many people speaking about it lately and bringing awareness to it, I loved this post! 🌟💞

    Liked by 1 person

  2. It fills my heart with so much joy to know you’ve got your very own little miracle on the way, especially after reading this. I’m so glad you asked for help and, having been there myself, so proud of you for doing so.

    You are such a kind person, and this story is so uplifting. It can be hard to go back and think of those dark times, so well done for sharing this, and thank you.

    Ruth | http://www.ruthinrevolt.com

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I’m happy that you’re raising awareness of mental health. I feel like it’s very important and is often overlooked. I’m even more happy that you’re carrying a child and bless your husband for staying by your side. I’m rooting for you two! ♥

    Nancy ♥ exquisitely.me

    Like

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