Anxiety strikes again

It’s been a busy and challenging week for me and yesterday my anxiety took over and I became the version of myself I hate. The version I hardly recognise and the key sign that my anxiety has taken over.
I had a busy day yesterday with going to the Celtic game and going to a friend’s night out afterwards. I was looking forward to both and I tried to prepare and save my energy for it and rested for most of Friday night and Saturday morning. I didn’t feel anxious at all at the football and it wasn’t until I got home that it hit me.
Smack! That was what it felt like. My heart was pounding as I tried to pull myself together while getting ready. My thoughts were racing, my temperature went through the roof and I felt so uncomfortable in my own skin. I hated what I was wearing and I hated the person I seen in the mirror. I lashed out with panic; shouting and snapping at my husband. My heart still pounding, beating out my chest and the thought of the night out was slowly slipping away from my reach.
I managed to get myself together. I rushed out the door barely acknowledging my husband. I hated that my anxiety had me and I was attacking those close to me.
As always, once I was over the door and out I was fine and nobody would have known. What I should have done in that situation was to take 10 minutes out to just think and to calm myself down. It’s always a learning curve with anxiety and one day I’ll completely conquer it.

13 thoughts on “Anxiety strikes again”

  1. I do have some moments like yours because I’m extremely shy and introvert so I need to chill beforehand if I’m gonna hang out w/ alot of people. Anxiety is a pain in the ass and i’m really sorry you have to experience it x

    Like

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